(Conversation that occurred last night at dinner)
Carly: Nate, I haven’t figured out what you’re going to do in the wedding.
Nate: What do you mean?
Carly: I haven’t figured out if you’re going to hand out programs or seat people or what, since you won’t be standing with the wedding party.
Nate: Why am I not standing with the wedding party?
Carly: Because you’re not wearing a black suit. You’re wearing a grey suit.
Janean: You’re supposed to wear a black suit.
Nate: So what? You said that was fine.
Carly: I said that was fine if that’s what you wanted to wear, but you couldn’t stand next to the ten people in black suits if you did that.
Janean: You should get a black suit.
Nate: Nobody will even notice.
Carly: Everyone will notice. The people attending the wedding know the difference between grey and black.
Janean: We’re all going to be in black. I have a black dress.
Carly: See? Black.
Janean: Ooooh, you could totally get a black suit at Goodwill or some other thrift store.
Carly: Wow, it’s like Janean was on my side and then she just decided to harpoon my wedding. Please do not wear a black suit from Goodwill.
Nate: I offered to wear a black suit.
Janean: No, you offered to wear a tuxedo.
Nate: A tuxedo is practically a black suit.
Janean: No, it’s not.
Carly: It’s really not, dude.
Janean: The only person in a tux is the person getting married.
Carly: Right. Kyle is in a tux.
Nate: But it’s the same thing.
Carly: No. No. See, it’s like how Janean is wearing a dress and I’m wearing a dress, but she’s wearing a bridesmaid dress and I’m wearing a wedding gown. Both dresses, but wildly different things.
Janean: Oh yeah, you don’t really want me to send you a picture of the dress I’m wearing, do you?
Carly: Yes, that’s why I asked everyone to send me pictures of what they were wearing.
Janean: Oh, I didn’t think you meant me, though.
Carly: Every person I sent that letter to doesn’t think I meant them. We have an entire wedding party of people who think that they have a special exception.
Nate: I sent you a picture.
Carly: Yes, of you in a grey suit. I asked for you in a black suit. It’s like you almost got it, but you really kind of didn’t at all.
Nate: Oh. So wait, you want me to wear a black suit at the wedding?
Janean: From Goodwill.